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I wish I could throw off the thoughts which poison my happiness. And yet I take a kind of pleasure in indulging them. – Frederic Chopin  (via s-e-l-f-destruction)
I’m sorry body. I haven’t been taking care of you lately.
I’m rather lost. There’s this little tumor like thing in my heart which is invisible to everyone. Its causing me so much discomfort but I can’t let go.
If I wasnt counting calories, working out, & trying to lose weight I honestly don’t know what I would do with my life.

If you ask me what I want I actually already know it. It’s a matter of time or the amount of guts I have.

Teaching myself to feel numb and being free from emotions. Feels rather good. Not feeling anything. 



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